Funny Jokes : An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world

An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world.

So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando, thinking that he would start by working his way across the USA from South to North.

On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read "$10,000 per call".

The American, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for.

The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God.

The American thanked the priest and went along his way.

Next stop was in Atlanta. There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the same golden telephone with the same sign under it.

He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in Orlando and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was.

She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God.

"O.K., thank you," said the American.

He then travelled to Indianapolis, Washington DC, Philadelphia, Boston and New York.

In every church he saw the same golden telephone

with the same "$10,000 per call" sign under it.

The American, upon leaving Vermont decided to travel to up to Canada to see if Canadians had the same phone.

He arrived in Canada, and again, in the first church he entered, there was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read "40 cents per call."

The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign.  "Father, I've travelled all over America and I've seen this same golden telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, but in the US the price was $10,000 per call.

Why is it so cheap here?"

The priest smiled and answered, "You're in Canada now, son - it's a local call".

Funny Jokes ; There was a preacher whose wife was expecting a baby

There was a preacher whose wife was expecting a baby so he went to the
congregation and asked for a raise. After much consideration and discussion,
they passed a rule that whenever the preacher's family expanded, so would
his paycheck.

After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the Congregation decided
to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher's salary.
There was much yelling and bickering about how much the clergyman's
additional children were costing the church.

Finally, the Preacher got up and spoke to the crowd, "Children are a gift
from God," he said. Silence fell on the congregation.

In the back of the room, a little old lady stood up and in her frail voice
said, "Rain is also a gift from God, but when we get too much, we wear
rubbers".

And the congregation said, "amen."

Hilarious Joke To Tell People - A good nun joke

A good nun joke

A cabbie picks up a Nun. She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring.

He replies: "I have a question to ask you, but I don't want to offend you"

She answers, "My son, you cannot offend me.

When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive."

"Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me."

She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2, you must be Catholic."

The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I'm single and Catholic!

"OK" the nun says. "Pull into the next alley." The nun fulfills his fantasy with a kiss that would make a hooker blush.

But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.

"My dear child," said the nun, why are you crying?"

"Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish."

The nun says, "That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm going to a gay Halloween party."

3 men standing in front of God

God: Men, what car you get in Heaven will depend on how faithful you were to your wives on Earth.Man 1: Please God, I can't count how many times I cheated on my wife. There were just too many beautiful women on Earth, and I had to have them all.God: I am ashamed of you, my man, For that, I give you a run-down truck that barely moves.Man 2: Dear God, please forgive me! I cheated on my wife once, just once! We were going through problems and I took the wrong turn. Please forgive me!God: My man, I am ashmed of you too. But I will be kinder to you. For that, I give you a convertible BMW.Man 3: Dear God, you will be so proud of me. I loved and worshipped my wife. I brought her roses everyday after work, I brought her gifts every aniversary, and we went travelling, and had dinner out 3 times a week, and...God: Okay, my man, enough! I get the point. I am very proud of you! For that, I give you any car you desire!Two weeks later Man 1 and 2 are driving on the freeway when they see Man 3 ahead of them, stopped in the middle of the road in his Black Jaguar.Man 1 and 2: Hey Man! Why are you sitting in your car and crying your eyes out? You're acting like some ungrateful bugger! Look at your car, man! What is your problem?!Man 3: "I just saw my wife on rollerskates!